REVIEW: Ample Hills’ Corn to Run

Before Peanut Butter Munchies took the crown of the 2018 Ample Hills Flavor Frenzy contest, there was a corny co-champion from online voting that was also brought back from the dead and produced for a limited time. The two flavors were both churned, in scoop shops and available to order for shipping for one week, before one was crushed. Only 70 pint packs went out and I was lucky enough to get one of them. I’m extremely glad I had the big bucks to shell out with the quickness, because the runner up is far better than its dangling silver medallion implies. Corn to Run combines a creamy corn ice cream with cornmeal crumble and blueberry swirls.


The creamy corn ice cream is incredible and without a doubt the best corn-based ice cream I’ve ever had. It’s bursting with rich, deep, corn sweetness that tastes like a perfectly prepared cob of corn smeared with sweet creamy honey butter. It has an immaculately smooth texture on par with anything in Ample Hills’ impressive catalog and carries an inventive yet crave-able-ness that is everything gourmet ice cream is all about. Even more alluring is the actual smell of the ice cream, which when I put my nose into the cool pint actually blossoms with an amazingly authentic corn aroma like I was sniffing a casserole at an indulgent banquet.



The “cornmeal crumble” is really more chunks of cornbread cookies and they are incredible. Crunchy, gritty, sweet, salty, slightly greasy, and full of delicious cornbread flavor. The texture is very similar to the awesome clusters in The Munchies and the way they hold such intense crunch in the succulent corn cream is remarkable. They’re mostly smaller pieces with the occasional boulder, and in both sizes I can’t get enough. The flavor of the chunks combined with the base makes the profile as a whole taste like cornbread ice cream and it’s truly terrific.


The blueberry swirls are the least dominant component in the pint but they add a nice touch of acidity and fruity sweetness that feels very welcome in the grand corny scheme of the flavor. I wish the swirls were a bit thicker, but they play the role of a gentle spread of jam across the top of some cornbread, and their backseat makes sense. Had there been some larger lush ribbons or even a pool or two against the sides of the container I can only imagine how beautiful the berry burst would have been.


As terrific as PB Munchies is, it’s a shame this flavor saw such a short rebirth. Corn to Run is incredibly unique yet undeniably scoopable, and I hope it gets an encore performance sometime in the near future.

Rating: 9.5/10

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REVIEW: Ben & Jerry’s Moo-Phoria Light Ice Cream (P.B. Dough, Caramel Cookie Fix, Chocolate Milk & Cookies)

If Halo Top are going to stake the claim as the best selling ice cream pint in 2017, then my god the big dawgs better come to play. I have nothing against Halo or any of the lighter dessert options that have exploded in recent years, but if they’re going to take command over the market and shelf space away from the rich beautifully crafted ice cream of my dreams, then it’s up to the titans to respond. There’s no bigger player in the vast grocery ice cream game than Ben & Jerry’s, and to kick off a loaded 2018 lineup of decadent pints, they’ve also rolled out a new line of light ice cream’s called Moo-Phoria. This is not the protein-enriched artificial sweetener-leaning stuff that’s dominating the frozen aisle right now, but a lower sugar, lower fat alternative that hints towards some of B&J’s staples.

P.B. Dough

Chocolate with gobs of chocolate chip peanut butter cookie dough


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REVIEW: Suzy Q’s (“Even Better Tasting”, 2018)

The bitch is back, and she’s bringin’ the thicc-ness. No, I’m not talking about Elton John, I’m talking about snack cakes, of course, and not that perma-smirkin’ Little Debbie either. I’m talkin’ about the oft-forgotten about clunky, chunky, highly criticized girl named Suzy Q.

Growing up I felt like the only weirdo that actually liked Suzy Q’s. Like most Hostess products they were essentially the same ingredients put into a different shape, but Suzy took all of the glamour out of it – no rolls, no hidden filling, no chocolate coating. Naked and exposed sponge cake with a layer of frosting. That’s it. And I loved ‘em. Then again, I also loved Sno Balls, Raspberry Zingers, and pretty much any and all quick fix cake injections, so I guess I’m just a fiend. While not nearly as pretty as a Cupcake garnished with a perfect white twirl, I always admired Suzy’s heftiness and stripped down nature, and for 2018 she’s back; “even better tasting”, and bigger than ever.


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REVIEW: Ample Hills’ Peanut Butter Munchies

Flavor Frenzy 2018. They battled. We voted. I campaigned. Team peanut butter got the victory. After a grueling bracket filled with succulent scoops of Ample Hills’ past, the return of Peanut Butter Munchies became a reality. The nut-ified twist on AH’s classic combines a peanut butter pretzel custard with caramelized clusters of Ritz crackers, potato chips, pretzels, and Reese’s Pieces.


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REVIEW: Ben & Jerry’s Chocolate Shake It Truffles

Here’s a hot take for ya: I hate milkshakes. Okay, maybe “hate” is a strong word, but in most situations I find milkshakes totally pointless. I am of the mindset that we shouldn’t drink our calories, and much like soda is a silly way to take in 50 grams of sugar, I don’t want to slurp down 1,000 calories of dairy bliss.

Sure, a burger, shake, and fries is a classic pairing if you want to go into an immediate food coma, but I’d rather have my burger and fries with some water and go in on a double scoop for dessert. I also believe that well crafted ice cream is a thing of beauty and watering it down with more milk is simply sacrilege. That being said, I do like me a little maltiness from time to time, and Ben & Jerry’s are giving me the opportunity to indulge in the classic shake experience without breaking my no straw rule. Chocolate Shake It Truffles combines a chocolate malt milkshake ice cream with chocolate-cookie covered fudge truffles and marshmallow swirls.


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REVIEW: Super Mario Cereal

I’ve said it before but I’ll say it again, because honestly why the hell else am I eating all of this oddly fun factory food – nostalgia is a helluva drug. In the early 90’s little Sean E was a highly impressionable sprouting lad who loved his Nintendo, Raisinets, and professional wrestling. My favorite cereal at the time was WWF’s Superstars Hulk Hogan Cereal, which was a super basic sweetened puffed corn cereal that I’m sure would be exceedingly average if I had it today.


Image: The Wild Robot!

But back then, when Hulkamania was the SHIT the cereal tasted like magic. I can’t explain exactly what it tasted like but the best comparison I have today based on hazy memory is the underrated Post Honey Oh’s, which still slap. Fast forward to 2018 and my cereal nostalgia button has officially been switched with Super Mario Cereal, which combines mixed berry cereal with marshmallows.


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REVIEW: Salt & Straw’s Sweet Corn & Waffle Cones

I could go on and on about how much I love Salt & Straw’s Chocolate Caramel Potato Chip Cupcake. I’ve made it my mission this year to get everyone I possibly can to hear me out and try it. CCPCC is the fine craft of ice cream perfected to such a degree that I hope it comes back every March, or in my dreams, permanently. Another of this months voted back offerings, Meyer Lemon Meringue Pie, is no slouch either, but there’s a sneaky good flavor lingering beneath the glitz and glam that really deserves your attention too. Sweet Corn & Waffle Cones combines a sweet corn ice cream with chocolate covered waffle cones, freckles of salted brown butter, and ribbons of rich vanilla caramel.


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